Month: May 2012

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Rainy Days & Thunder


Pig Writes:

 

Ever have one of those days when the rain comes down and there is nothing to do other than watch it? I had that kind of day today. The weather man said “Rain in the afternoon.” But as life would have it, the weather outside said something different.

I didn’t have anything important to do today. Maybe I could get a little sun so my tan stays nice and pink. As I tried to find something to watch on TV, I quickly became bored with that. I tried teasing the cats, but all they wanted to do was sleep (buttheads).

I stood there at the kitchen window watching bucket size droplets of water splash on the ground. I noticed that the more it rained the more the drainage swale in the back yard filled up with run-off. I was bored out of my mind.

The only sounds I heard was the tick of the clock on the wall. It made a feeble attempt to keep in rhythm with the rain outside.

Tick… Tock… Plink, Plink, Plink. Tick… Tock… Plink, Plink, Plink.

No beer in the house… Tick-Tock, Plink.

No one to talk to… Tick-Tock, Plink

Nothing to do but just sit here… Tick-Tock, Plink, Plink,Plink.

What to do… What to do…..

Screw this.

In fast move, I grabbed ol’ blue and I chucked his furry butt right out the door and into the drainage swale.

Why?

Because it’s fun to watch cats get wet. That’s why!

Ol’ Blue landed right in the big puddle of muddy water. He was in there for about .5 of a second before he hauled ass back into the house. Soaking wet and screaming his head off, he tried to run from me. His wet, muddy paws lost all traction on the tile floor. Bailey took one look at Blue and disappeared faster than a plate of fresh baked cookies.

I guess she knew her turn was next. After I wiped the tears from my eyes for laughing so hard, I noticed the rain was coming down hard again. That was when I decided why should I let Blue have all the fun? Besides, he’ll just spend the rest of the day licking himself clean. I flung open the back door again. With a running start I headed straight for the water. I dove across the top of the water, doing my own version of a hydroplane. When I hit the mud it was like having a home made Slip-n-Slide.

It was great-the water was cold and refreshing. I wallowed in the muddy water just slipping and sliding, flinging mud everywhere. What a fun day this turned out to be. I can’t remember the last time it was I just played in the rain. I recommend it to everyone. It is a great way to wash the blues away.

Have you ever had a day like this? Drop me a comment and tell me all about it. I would love to hear from you!

Tune in next time piglets to find out what happens when you drag lots of mud into the house and don’t clean it up.

As always

Ride HARD or Stay Home

Pig

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First Publication Part Two


 

First publication Part two

Pig Writes

Keep squeezing ’cause I’m still squealing. Last post I told you of my first published article. Ahhh the joy, the happiness, the drunkiness (is that a word?) With all of my celebrating I almost forgot to turn in the next article on time. (That would not have been good.)

The time came for article number two to be released. Only this time I was suppose to get my copy in the mail. Friday’s release date came, I opened the mail box – nope, it’s not in there, Dammit!

Immediately I began to itch, it felt worse than having fleas. I wanted to see my hard work in print. I begged Rainman to take me over to Cowboys in the morning. When we got there they didn’t get their copies in yet. Dammit, what is the deal? There is no mail on Sundays, which meant I would have to wait until Monday. That still left me without a copy of the mag.

Dejected once again, I felt flat. I couldn’t understand it, am I going to have to deal with this every month? If so, I think I would rather have a girl friend on her period. At lease then I could just walk away (sorry ladies). I couldn’t understand it – no copy in the mail and no time to get one from the Harley dealer. To make matters worse, the on-line version hasn’t posted yet. I can’t even review it there and post a link on the blog. This has become nerve racking. All I wanted was to see if my dreams continued to come true.

That night while I was on my laptop, I was bored out of my mind with playing Spider Solitaire. I clicked over to check my e-mails. There was a message from my editor, Shelly.

Pig,

Sorry this has taken so long, I have been busy getting the May issue out the door.

OK, I can deal with that.

Unfortunately I miss placed your mailing address. Could you please resend it to me?

WHAT!?! Oh my God, how could this have happened?

This is worse than forgetting to use keywords!

This is worse than forgetting to use spell check!

This is almost as bad as running out of beer!

I quickly resent her my address – it’s only 8:00 in the evening. Maybe she can get my copy in the mail tonight.

Twenty minutes later I received a response from Shelly. “Oh good, I hope it means my copy is in the mail” I though to myself.

Thanks Pig, I’ll get your stuff in the mail in the next day or two. BTW, I have to move deadlines up one week. Can’t wait to see your next article.

Shelly

“NNNOOOOOOOOOOO!”……………

Ride HARD or Stay Home

Pig

 

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My First Publication


My first publication Part one.

Pig Writes:

Well squeeze me til I squeal. There is nothing like the feeling inside of being published for the first time. Funny thing is how you think things will progress and what actually happens are always two different things.

After I received word that Thunder Roads Texas wanted to publish one of my submissions. I didn’t have much time to come down off my “high” before they offered me a monthly feature spot. I gladly accepted the position in less than about twenty seconds. I was bouncing off all four walls and I even swung around a few times on the ceiling fan. The joy, the elation, it was all so over powering.

The day finally came when the magazine with my article was released. Rainman and I hauled tail over to Cowboys Harley Davidson to grab a copy off the shelf. I just had to see my article in print – that was the only way I knew if the dream was real or not. We walked in and was greeted by the lovely ladies behind the cashier counter (I just love their smiles). Rainman stopped to say hello to Hank (one of the salesman) while I headed over to the mag rack. Dammit, no copies. Hank came over to see if he could help. I asked him where the mags were? “Not here yet – should be in tomorrow”.

 Thunder Roads Texas

Dejected and bummed out, I could feel the weight of my head pushing down my neck and into my shoulders. I went home to sulk. When your dreams seem like they are crashing down around you, it makes you feel worse than being turned down by a stripper. We returned the next day. There it was, I saw it in the mag rack. It glowed like a beacon in the dark of night. That mag rack held what was now my dreams that just came true. I reached over and grabbed two copies.

Rainman and I wasted no time in turning to the page. There it was all laid out in front of us. I saw my words and sentences with pictures of our friends. Rainman suddenly grabbed me and got me out of there. And it was just in a nick of time. That is before I started bouncing off the walls with all those expensive Harley’s around me..

After we got home, I was so ecstatic that I forgot to do a blog post to announce the news. For the next two weeks I was showing anyone who was interested the article.

That is until Rainman reminded me of my pending deadline for the next months article. “Oh shit”, it’s time for me to get busy. I guess I better learn to manage my time better if I am going to do this.

Ride HARD or Stay Home

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Pig, Where are you?


Pig Writes

 

Greetings to all my lovers of Pork,

 

Yeah, I know, Its been a while since I posted.  I’ve been busy writing for Thunder Roads and staying in trouble.  Today’s post is about the later.  Seems to me that lately, Rainman has been working a little too much overtime at work.  I hate it when he does that.  It gets too quite around the house when it is just me and the cats all day (the only thing they want to do is sleep all day). 

 

I decided last Thursday to give my trusted pilot a friendly little reminder of what is important at home.  People need that every once in a while.  It is not good to forget who your friends are. I have found that life can make it easy to forget those who are important.  And it hurts when you do.

 

Sadly I haven’t made it to a bike night in the past three weeks.  That sucks because I have a reputation to uphold here.  I need to be seen by my peeps, I need to be unified with my brotherhood of fellow bikers.  Not being able to be seen is just unacceptable in my opinion.

 

What did I do? I gave Rainman a little reminder that I was still here waiting on him.  Last Friday Rainman had a seminar to attend and he had to teach a class to a group of professional Engineers and Contractors.  Using my stealth capabilities, I borrowed his laptop when he wasn’t looking and made a few adjustments to his presentation.  Nothing major, in fact, all I did was add two little old slides to the presentation.  And besides, who cares about that crap anyway?

Hey Dad, Bring home more Cheetos

And More Beer! 

 

And what does he do?  Well, when he got home he walks in the front door, grabs me by the neck and does this.

 

Somebody Help Me Please !

He left me there, in the garage, for three days.  When he finally cut me down it took two more days for all of the blood to drain back out of my head.  And that my friends is why I haven’t posted for a few days.

 

Ride HARD or Stay Home

 

Pig